Trying to put it in words 3rd day on the pills

Okay Let me try and put my whole day in words.
I woke up and felt depressed so I took my pill, I still felt depressed.
It was my birthday on the 21st of September, and I thought it was going to be a good time, but it wasn't.
First off my mother forgot my birthday, I had no gifts, my mother did buy me a cake I thanked her for it.
It felt like my birthday is not even worth having because no one was happy and I wasn't happy, I hated my birthday.
Then I found out my friend went behind my back and was texting my cousin and they fucked, normally that wouldn't make people mad, but I'm fucked in the brain and this pisses me off.
I forgave them and then my so called friend started pissing me off, so fuck them both!
No one really cares about me, I come last on the list for everyone I know this, but I just wish on my birthday I would come at least 3rd or something.
I will never be first on anyone's list, no one could and will ever love me for me, and I can't be someone they want me to be, I've tried that and I failed hard.
So on my third day of taking my happy pills, not good I feel so down and out and depressed and I hate it.
Also some people rang for me from a clinic, to ask me some questions and I was in such shock that I said I couldn't talk at the moment and for them to ring back the next day, I suck hard.
I just hate my life, there is nothing good in it apart from my animals, and today I got burgerking for my breakfast I felt happy when I ate it, no wonder I'm a fat pig, because food makes me happy, but as soon and all the food is gone I feel like shit again, how could eat that, how could I be so stupid and lame to do that to myself.
Nope I can't do anything right, I suck at everything, I'm stupid I'm dumb [even though they meen the samething].
I hate myself!